Want a legal opinion

4 years ago

We will be completing 7 years of marriage in coming few months. We both are working professionals both from IT background. He is overweight and hefty, Soon after marriage, i came to know about his Diabetes and other health ailments such as high BP, veritgo etc. During early days of marriage we tried to get physical but i guess it was never a successful encounter. The symptoms for a successful mating was never evident in my case. As a newly weded i never understood what successful encounter is supposed to be but i used to remember he used to get depressed after unsuccessful attempt. He said the reason is anxiety and so on. Later we completely stopped being physical, maybe because of his mental block of non performance. When i used to raise issue to talk being health is major reason which is acting as spoilsport, he always used to end up discussion in fights and ignorance. To avoid fights and his BP shoot up i never directly addressed lack of Physical intimacy with him and hoped we could work out problem with Medical treatments. We started many treatments, went to the best doctors in the city for past 4 to 5 years the problems which came up were low sperm count and ED (Which he never accepts) but due to his poor IT lifestyle, eating habits and poor health nothing helped to improve his condition. Due to family and social pressure, started planning for a baby and opted for IUI treatment which failed. Then we consulted one of best andrologist to address his issue. he said you had only 2 options either t go for a Test tube baby or Adoption. He was devastated he came back and told this options to me. Being from conservative middle class family i knew adoption was ever an option so only option left was IVF. So i didn't choose any of his options and said lets be hopeful give your best, reduce 30 kg as said by doc, just by taking medicines wont help in your case you need to be strict with diet and exercise. As i didn't choose any of options given by me, he went into depression didn't talk to me for 4 months. Gave up hope and life. Started Blaming me and my family , dug up all pity household fights about my family and mine and Later he started feeling suicidal and consulted Psychiatrist, was put on anti depressant. Then i shared everything with his and mine Parents. They were devastated to know they said better live separate for sometime to settle the matter, attend counselling sessions. We attended Marriage counselling sessions, but counselor never schooled me about anything. But after the last session my husband started doubting counselors judgment and abilities too. and said it was not fruitful. i suppose he as schooled him which led him to this conclusion. We were stayed separately for period of 1 year, and there was no progress in our matter. Both busy in our jobs we sometimes used to talk over fone. But he always used to bring up household fights to cover up main issue. Also he denied that he has any Physical problem related to Sexual Encounter. So i said lets give our marriage one chance as you said there is no Heath issue pertaining to Physical intimacy. And then i came back to his house but its been 1 month over still no physical intimacy yet. He said lots has been said and done it will take time. Now I am doubtful about following points. 1. How a male can leave without any physical intimacy for years to years gives reason of anxiety and household fights for on interest. this is only possible if he has medical problem, or fear of non performance. 2. His Non acceptance about his health problem? 3. Am i wasting my time giving second chance as its already 7 years gone of my life and haven't experienced any married life pleasure as such. 4. I was always hopeful that situation will improve with his efforts and advanced medical science which led to time span of 7 years and no output in hand. 5. I always stood by him, because he has always fulfilled all other duties of husband, ans as human being better person than i am. So thought if leaving him because of this issue never crossed my mind. My conscious didn't allow meto do this with such a good human being. 6. Me being normal have basic expectations from marriage which is leading to dissatisfaction. Seeking legal help on my matter with the consequences which will give clarity in my thoughts. Please help.