Adopting a Child in India

Adoptions were dissolved in recent times at an alarming rate over a period of few years which resulted in an outcry. Experts and observers working in adoption reminisce that a few years ago there were a handful of dissolution cases. What dissolution of adoption essentially means is that after going through a long drawn process of approximately two years for adopting a child, parents make a decision of giving up the child upon receipt of a court decree finalizing and sealing the child’s adoption into the family.

It's worrying because of many reasons. The plight of a child who has gone through a roller coaster journey of being relinquished by biological parents can be well imagined. The child may have been in an institution, a family may have accepted the child but then rejected and sent the child back to the institution. A child who has to undergo such trials and tribulations and turmoil has to bear the lifelong scar, not to mention the fact that the child’s safety, security, and even future is uncertain.

Besides, parents who had a standard lag time of about two years for adopting a young and healthy child from the Central Adoption Resource Authority (CARA) are typically eager and oftentimes anxious to greet a child all of a sudden however cannot accept the child. According to experts in the case of older children who have spent years in an institution dissolution is more common. Undoubtedly, the decision to let go of the child is painful for the parents after having waited eagerly to greet a child into their household.

The angst of parents over reneging on their decision to adopt aside, children should not be likened to products that one can purchase and then return it to the shop. All said and done, a parent can never give up one of their own for a child’s looks or behavior therefore when it comes to adopting a child the decision to adopt should not be reversed at the last minute.

What could be the root cause of parents arriving at the decision of dissolving the impending adoption seemingly whimsically particularly when parents await their turn for years is the burning question. A lot of the agony can be averted once the adoption process is humanized and the parents are prepared.  

The vast majority of parents these days would rather adopt an older child or child who can be placed immediately after being refused by other adoptive parents. Parents these days would rather adopt an older child or a child in immediate placement category; these are children who even after multiple referrals have been refused or are children with mild deformities that may not be noticeable to the naked eye or may look sickly or are underweight although healthy overall so as to lessen their seemingly interminable waiting period.

There are a handful of healthy children under the age of two years of age for thousand-odd parents who are awaiting adoption. Rebound adoption essentially means, grief-stricken parents pondering adoption or who may have thought they would be supportive of a child with special needs.

After the child is brought home, the child may not look exactly what the parents may have visualized or can cope neither with looks, language or behavior of the naive child.

The very fact that the matter reaches the dissolution of adoption, where parents consciously make the decision of giving the child back to the agency is an indication that the parents were unprepared. Adoption is an extremely emotive issue as a child is brought into the lives of adoptive parents permanently, and the child is to be loved and cared for as one’s own. Hence, adoptive parents ought to be able to connect and bond with their child and more so in the case of an older child who can recall being abandoned and time spent at the institution.

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